My life is rather incredible right now. I think this summer, more than any other before, will be a distinct cross road of my life. Part of this cross road is that in 13 days I am leaving for North Carolina.
To be honest, my motivation for going has since changed significantly since buying the plane tickets last fall.
My original and only intentions when I pressed the purchase button was to leave Utah. I was sick and tired to the sheltered atmosphere, and I was craving my southern home, and southern friends. I didn't understand why anyone would want to live in a valley filled with mormons, and furthermore, why they had no intention of leaving.
Then as my life began to change, and I slowly started to understand the way of life here, I didn't want to leave as bad. I said that this place would never become a permanent home to me, but this experience was something I wouldn't trade for the world. I still most certainly wanted to go back, but I want to go back so that I could relive for just 3 weeks the first 16 years of my life. So that I could remember what living in the old south felt like.
And again my life shifted. This one would be more dramatic possibly than moving across country in the first place. With out detail, my life is not the same as it was before, but regardless of the change I am happier than ever to know who I really am. These past few weeks are driving me crazy.
For what ever reason, when driving down the high way leaving work, or walking up to my friend's house, I take a look up at the mountains and at the glorious orange sunset upon the clouds and it enters my mind that I am about to leave this place for a month.
And then I get sad.
Which has never, ever happened to me for the past 10 months of living here. Suddenly all my emotions of annoyance and disdain for the beehive state have turned into some form of love. I really don't know what changed.
Possibly it may be this girl:
Miss Aerielle Barlow. The girl whose name I couldn't spell for a month. I can't even begin to explain how much this girl has changed my life. I have formed a love for her that I simply can't explain. Certainly not romantic, but as much as I call her my sister, I don't think that cuts it. She is truly a best friend of the highest degree. Someone I can love and trust more than any other. I simply cannot imagine my life without her.
I have no idea why, but this place feels like home.
My mind is continually boggled.